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This parody of Jingle Bells was written by Eno Remnant for the enjoyment of the players of CYOC. Eno Remnant holds no claim to the original Jingle Bells, but as a public domain song and under the right of parody, he is permitted to create this version.


Dashing out through space,

In an insanely fast starship.

Bouncing over asteroids,

Fleeing from E Chip. (Oh no, no)


Warning klaxons blare,

Surrounded by red lights.

We flee in terror because,

It's CYOC's slaying night.


Oh, E Chip kills,

Magery thrills,

Ninja's kinda lame.

Wayne he has a company,

And Aicy is quite tame.


Cabbage shields,

Warp core fields,

Eno’s big death thing.

The chances of death are scary high,

So in terror we do sing.


Ninja’s arming his warheads,

Djinn is laying out his FOG.

Magery’s Hyperion,

Is shielding cats from dogs.


[The following lyrics are not Eno's work]Faj is making Destroyers,

And painting them in blue,

He's pulling out his smoke machine,

And bolting it on too.


Will he join the war?

Or just make like the French?

He's bringing out his shocktroopers,

So dive into that trench![Eno's work continues from here]


Then NC comes in to play,

Conjoiners in the lead.

The OZE soon follows,

And now I think it’s time to flee.


Oh, Joseph’s king,

Railguns fling,

Slugs at all our shields.

E Chip’s on a rampage,

And there goes my Alar field.


Dano’s clones are out in force,

Lsuv and J68 cowering.

Your death it won’t come swiftly,

So all that’s left to do is sing.


Attacker’s Moar Dakka,

Is lighting up the scene.

Volcano’s nation Juton,

Is eerily serene.


Glock’s Strannaxi flood the Earth,

Apocalypse galore.

Wayne’s elves are now called courtesans,

Because it’s still rude to call them whores.


Oh, Gnu hates trolls,

Porsche writes the rolls,

Scorched is afk.

Shing is doing his own thing,

And Sith and WIM are MIA.


Poseidon’s god,

Faron’s god,

The Twin Gods intervene.

This slaying night is over,

Now who’s up for round three?

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